My Story
Before I became an entrepreneur, I found myself with a plum job out of graduate school supervising Bachelor’s Degree level Behavioral Specialists. That job turned into a nightmare when I found myself supervising a narcissist (who I will refer to moving forward as “The Narcissist”) who was lying about being a student in a clinical graduate degree program.
My “a-ha” moment happened when I did some digging and found out that I had an administrative contact at the school where The Narcissist had claimed to be a student. My contact reported that she was not in any graduate program and had been hired under false pretenses. She told me that what was happening was extremely serious and putting the safety of clients at risk. I brought this news to my boss.
My boss at the time told me it was “inappropriate” to verify her credentials. I was stunned as The Narcissist’s behavior was actively putting families and children in danger. I decided to look for another job because I realized that appeals to reason and facts were going to go nowhere with upper management. I knew I could not operate safely in an environment where the management was turning a blind eye to blatant safety issues. I did not want to work where my clients were at unnecessary risk.
On my way out, my boss thanked me for the warning after she discovered that this person was committing fraud.
Through this experience, I learned that managers at the doctorate level can be ignorant about the dynamics of narcissistic behavior at the workplace. Ignorance is not bliss–it cost my boss a highly trained staff member and could have possibly cost her business if I had not warned her about the red flags. The damage had been done; trust had been broken. I also learned that no amount of money or professional opportunity was worth risking my mental health, my physical health, or my integrity.
A few years after I left the job supervising The Narcissist, I learned that I was the child of a narcissistic mother–and that my mother’s behavior had negatively impacted my self-esteem and mental health through the course of my lifetime. I got the message that everything was my fault being raised by a woman who had no accountability, zero self-reflection, and the same entitled attitude as my former supervisee. I started to let go of years of self-blame and felt empowered for the first time in my life. I realized that I was not crazy.
Twelve years later, I’m a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist in California (#98192) and Narcissistic Abuse Treatment Clinician certified under Dr. Ramani Durvasula–the top clinical expert in narcissistic abuse.
If you survived being raised by caregivers who ignored, minimized, dismissed, or insulted your needs, you have superpowers you aren’t aware of. These abilities include advanced problem-solving and the ability to pivot under extreme stress. I can help you identify the strengths that you have been told—all your life–were weaknesses because they did not please the ego of your narcissistic parent. You have resources you can’t yet imagine.
My mission is to help managers in helping professions–particularly adult children of narcissists–prevent burnout and protect their careers by empowering them with strategies to identify, cope with, and eliminate unhealthy workplace behavior and be as happy and productive as possible. My promise is to help you uncover your superpowers and equip you with practical, actionable tools that you can use to navigate difficult situations.